two x's connected by a dotted line
a special gift to you
one representing where you are
and what is left to do

it's so easy to forget what you want
i pull the question from my skull
it's so easy to forget

refracted, distracted, replaced by bigger ones
a special gift to you
both representing where we are
and what we didn't do

it's so easy to forget what you want
i pull the question from my skull
it's so easy to forget

and i don't care to talk about the past
i cheated everyone
i beat the odds and beat the band
but i've forgotten what i've won
i forget

02.  Radiapathy

i get out of bed the same way everyday
blurry eyed and waiting for the alarm to sing
sing me into fm radiapathy
numb and tired and perfect for the working day

i get home and turn the cable strobe light on
to tell me who i'm not and what my life still lacks
yeah, if i could make a copy of myself, i might
so i could own twice as much as everything

come, it's time to wake up
know the way, you know the way

so i tell the world that it can kill its own
blow itself to smithereens for all i care
i will ride the wave into its smoking hole
i will be the vulture to its carrion

03.  The Prize Fighter

crossed off, but never forgotten
misplaced, but never loosing hold
these are the moments that bind us
repressed, but never erased
knocked down, but never giving up
locked up where no one can find us
we'll survive in here til the end

there are no more fights to fight
my trophies are the scars that will never heal
but i get carried away sometimes
i wake up in the night swinging at the ceiling
it's hard to leave old ways behind
but harder when you think that's all there is
don't look at me that way

ignored, when your whole world's collapsed
dismissed, before you speak a word
these are the moments that bind you
come clean, but everything's wrong
sustained, but barely holding on
run down, with no one to find you
we're survivors, here til the end

04.  Red, Like Roses

each night i close my eyes and wonder what will come of me in days to follow
i lay awake and after countless hours, i just can't think straight
turn in, fade, pass out

yet, in this simple way, we offer
to destroy all we can't figure out
in our simple lives, unconscious
we employ our skills from underground
to seek what we've never seen
to explore, deep inside

the mornings greet me with gray days and tear-stained windowsills and pillowcases
i get dressed and go to work
bloody noses, red like roses pose as a sanctuary
when i just need a minute to myself

and in this simple way, we offer
to destroy all we can't figure out
in our simple lives, unconscious
we employ our skills from underground
to seek what we've never seen
to find, where we never knew
to explore deep, inside

kill me, won't you kill me
kill me let me sleep again
kill me
don't relate your memories
kill me
kill me won't you

to see
what we've never seen to find
where we never knew to go
where we never dared to explore
deep ...

05.  Caspian Can Wait

he waits for the greater silence
as every day goes faster
a cipher he knows too well
of killing himself by looking closer

you've got so much love locked up inside you
just waiting to come out
you'll heal in the world in spite of itself
and make a better one
you say you're a veteran

he waits for the reign of his tyrants
to tire of their games
god save him
he'll be the one to fracture their fractus castles
and scatter their tiers on the pavement

you've got so much love locked up inside you
bursting at the seams
you'll kill the world in spite of itself
and make a better one
you say you're a veteran

caspian can wait sometimes
he'll be in the way sometimes
immortalized with every anguish we yield
this is our christening
nobody's listening

caspian can wait sometimes
he'll be in the way sometimes
immortalized with every anguish we sell
this is our christening
nobody's listening

06.  Four Story Tantrum

she lives in a four story tantrum
for a long face
the house that her parents hand-crafted for her
a trashcan, a toilet is all that she sees inside
outside a world that doesn't know her riddle
she doesn't need much besides the clothes on her floor
and solace in someone with softer remarks
the courage to be by herself and be okay this time
she just doesn't want to remember at all

so don't tell me i'm wrong or right
consider yourself for once
leave me alone to wrap myself up in my fantasies
snap me in half, burn me alive
i'll suffer it all for the consequences
are nothing at all
just tell me it starts all over now

life's too hard sometimes
you give it your all
and all that you get is tired
the more that you spend
the more all your friends begin
to see you erased
chastised and chaste from them

don't you fear, don't give up it's to late for now, but don't give up
it's too late, but don't you fear, don't give up

she lives in a four story tantrum
for a long face
and outside there's no one and nothing

07.  Into the Open

cry, child
try to be bigger than me
you'll see just how fast it all comes around
you'll never be much

daddy holds my head while i sleep
sings me songs that his father once penned for him
you'll never be much
you'll never be anything

into the open air
into your smiling mug
into the open air to prove you're the top
out of the fierce parade
and into you smiling mug
into the open air to prove you're the top

some days you don't want to get out of bed
so you don't and everyone gets ahead in the world
you'll never be much

some days the only thought that consoles your tired head
at the close of another dull day is
you'll never be much
you'll never be anything

(some people spend their whole lives saying 'come out and play with me, come out and stay with me, come out and play' and then they run away
they'll never be much)

(and if you wait your whole life for somebody to say to you, 'come out and play with me, come out and stay' and then you run away
you'll never be much
you'll never be anything)

08.  Penning the Penultimate

i'm a lot more than they think
but with the radio on, i try to go back to sleep
when all the world's posers blow smoke in my face
i think of the love that i can make
but i struggle so hard for each breath that i take

i get so sick that i can hardly speak
but with my head full of pills, i try to go back to sleep
when you're so sad, but you force up a grin anyway
it's hard not to feel fake
but i struggle so hard for each breath that i take

maybe someday i'll be at the top
and with my head in my hands i'll try to make it all stop
every time i find love i choke so hard that for weeks my body aches
but i struggle so hard for each breath that i take

yeah, be what you are
don't be what you are
when the world throws you down at its feet
at least you can know you've got it straight
we all struggle so hard for each breath that we take
and i struggle so hard for each breath that i take

09.  Your Last Words

do you hear that
that's your heartbeat
counting you down to your last words
do you feel it crawl down your skin
hands clutching your mouth
to stop them from coming out at all

but you don't cause you can't cross yourself
it can be all you have sometimes
it's a spark, it's enough
to pull you on your feet
pumping your fists in the air
i'll show them all what you are
and this time, you won't get away
cause i'm kicking your teeth to the curb

you want it so take it, i don't want to see you
you're the star
giving it all for the bright lights
think of all the money when you've everyone falling for your ...
and if you don't mind
just leave me out of your (dirty money / plastic party) you're just stalling
living it up for a false start
don't call me when you're broken-hearted and everyone's turning on you

do you hear that
that's your heartbeat
counting you down to your last words
when it all runs out, i'll be watching you
clutching your head
to stop the room from spinning round

too late, we're on a road to nowhere else
taking our time to pull you down
and i'm tired of taking my chances
i'm gonna let you
i'm gonna let you down

do what you want to
i'm gonna let you
i'm gonna let you down

10.  Death

when my time has come
i won't put up a fight
i'll hold my breath and let it wash over me

and all the words we said
all the words we said
have a way of rubbing off
but i send them so your courage could come back
and stay back
stay back

when i am, i can
they're all waiting for me
these eyes, these hands
let them wash over me

and run to your room while you're weeping
i'll see you in your bed while you're sleeping

well, farewell
i won't hold you down
no, i'll heal the cracks in your head
stay back